Ridiculous, puzzling and just plain weird book covers

So we have our thread about beautiful book covers, but what about the ones that stick out because they just don't seem to fit what the book is about? What about the ones that are so strange that we wonder if the people choosing them have even read the book? The ones that make you wonder 'what were they thinking'?

This is the thread for those. Starting with this one -



Um...yeah. I remember a bloodbath in a brothel not a punt on a pond.

>1 Bookmarque:
That is a super beginning. Well selected.

>1 Bookmarque: It could be meant as an awful warning about how men change into beasts...

>1 Bookmarque: Well, she is dressed in red.

>That looks like it was meant for an edition of An American tragedy.. Has anyone checked if there is an edition of that book with a bloodbath in a brothel on the cover???

>5 Sakerfalcon: It could be the Dreiser novel for sure. Love the movie adaptation though I haven't read it.

A quick scan through the 1400 covers for J&H here on LT and the closest I could come to a bloodbath cover is this -

Here's one that's odd -



It's been ages since I read it, but so far as I remember pretty much everyone on earth went blind at once. Don't think there were enormous warehouses full of black suits, hats, sunglasses and canes.

Here's a lovely one, but I fail to understand how a (heron?) bird with an egg in its beak has anything to do with the story -



It's a kidnapping story in involving a troubled young man, his identity and daddy issues. The body count isn't too high, but a bird didn't do it.

>8 Bookmarque: Does it make any more sense if you interpret that as a stork, with all of its connotations of bringing babies, and the egg as a cuckoo's egg?

It's a stretch, but ok. I thought of that, but it's still really weird for a noir novel.

Is there a character named Bill, who cracks the case, as the egg is cracked?

Sometimes I think cover artists are really busy, or very enamored with a certain drawing they have done, so they submit it and the publishers think that perhaps they are not clever enough to understand why that artwork was done for the story, and they don't want to admit that, so they just go with it .

I suspect >11 MrsLee: is onto something closer to the truth than any publisher would want to admit to.

Has been posted before, but in case you missed https://lithub.com/50-very-bad-book-covers-for-literary-classics/?fbclid=IwAR1IJ...

https://pics.cdn.librarything.com//picsizes/bb/a4/bba41dd9d3191bb59794c6a5377414... https://pics.cdn.librarything.com//picsizes/9c/3a/9c3a642a0ff5dae597949445077414...
https://pics.cdn.librarything.com/picsizes/52/38/52385c7d5582aba59376d4753414345...
I gather these cover photographs by Barry Lategan (and similar ones for her other novels) have no relevance to the contents, but Edna O’Brien was quite pleased with the boost in sales.

People have said that cephalopods are about the most alien creatures we can find without leaving the planet, but they aren't actually from another planet -

>15 Bookmarque: Weren't the Martians in War of the Worlds cephaloid?

Quite possibly, but I haven't read it as I hate to admit. Nor have I seen the movie or heard Welles's famous radio broadcast.

>15 Bookmarque: Particularly strange as the title refers to a remark by Dr Temple Grandin, the subject of one of the book’s essays, that as an autistic person she often felt, observing “normal” social behaviour, like an anthropologist on Mars, with no entrée into the social interactions of the inhabitants.

Two more. Remarkably similar and silly. What either has to do with the book I have yet to discover.

>19 Bookmarque: Those are awesome! Completely wrong for the book, but awesome :)

>19 Bookmarque: I think it's fairly obvious. These are early and rare feminist versions of that infamous tale. The first, of course, has a red dress on and is hitting helpless things with a club, clearly Ms. Hyde. She's wearing plaid, a nod to the author's heritage.

The second has Dr. Jekyll communing with her alter-ego Hyde. They are discussing the mountains they must overcome in this world as women.

>21 MrsLee: LOL

>19 Bookmarque: I feel extremely sorry for the woman in the first picture.

She has been obviously been frozen in terror for so long that someone has had time to design, make, and dress her in a dress where the pattern only connects if she does not move a muscle!

Wax has obviously been used to keep the folds stiff.. As one can see from the swirl lines in the skirt, which cross the lines of the tartan, the pattern is an optical illusion, which would break if the cloth of the skirt moves at all.

It all becomes clear to me now!

I have read this book a few times and well, not sure what the deal is here. A black widow spider finds a bleeding plant? Black widow spider goes vegetarian only to be surprised by plant blood? Plant bleeds on spider in a futile defense mechanism? Very weird and can't understand what it has to do with the plot.

>25 Bookmarque: Or plant is sweating with the effort of forcing its sharp-edged leaves into the poor little spider, which is bleeding profusely?

>26 -pilgrim-: I'll go with that. Poor girl.

Another weird Ross Macdonald cover. Someone sure had a thing for bird / nature themes.

So I've read all of the d'Artagnan novels and don't remember anything that could be remotely characterized like this -



It's a pretty political novel and even though many covers feature a guy in an iron mask, which at least is relevant, he's in the book for the equivalent of like 10 minutes of a film. The rest of it is war and political shenanigans. But I guess we need to appeal to and deceive the powder puff set.

>29 Bookmarque: You see that black, erm, "garter" in her hat? There is great political significance in that. Don't ask me what it is, because I don't know, but it's great.

https://pics.cdn.librarything.com/picsizes/7c/35/7c35fa0c9c1b0315933327858774345... You thought the “solitudes” in question were French and English Canada. Or maybe you didn’t, which is why you picked this up at the drug store and were subsequently as disappointed as the man on the front cover.

>30 MrsLee: Exactly. It is a mourning ribbon. She is obviously deeply distreesed by the events of the last page.

>19 Bookmarque: Have also seen the identical cover with the golfer used for Camille. Didn’t think of her as much of an outdoor girl. https://pics.cdn.librarything.com//picsizes/6d/6f/6d6f726d88930945969427a7967414...

This one is cool, but I don't remember any robot cello players in The Time Machine. Funny.

https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/P/1843441349.01._SX900_SY1270_SCL... Is this for real?

Probably. Hilarious though.

>36 Bookmarque: I see this publisher specialises in faux pulp covers https://pulptheclassics.com/index1.php?imprint=8&alltitlesbytitle=yes. Some great blurbs here: I like “The Hound of the Baskervilles—Murder…Mystery…Walkies!”

>36 Bookmarque: I'm speechless.

>37 booksaplenty1949: now that is a great blurb.

https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2CKkqNh-GEc/XurCccdRcZI/AAAAAAAAODM/cjkDYJC46GkLtUfZw... This was always one of my favourite scenes in The Seven Year Itch. Not too far off from real paperback covers from that time period. Tom Ewell is telling the artist to make the necklines lower.

Ok. So it's been a long time since I read Persuasion, but did it have Triffids?



And...is this an homage to Gorey?

Also...her chair is in another dimension.

>41 Bookmarque: That is downright weird! I've found those Penguin Deluxe covers to be a bit hit or miss for me.

https://pics.cdn.librarything.com//picsizes/ba/b8/bab873d8a31f17159795a574a67414... Close, but no cigar.

Adds a whole new dimension to the story.

How do I make the picture appear, not just the link?

you need to use HTML tags to the source photo.

Check out the Fancy things to Do thread for instructions.

>45 booksaplenty1949:

The link below will take you to the post that shows you how to post a picture. You use the "img src" feature and copy in the Image Address.

https://www.librarything.com/topic/177029#4750147

>47 pgmcc: Thank you.

>48 booksaplenty1949: the part that took me a few tries to get the hang of is that the image address has to be online someplace, not in your device. I kept trying to link photos that were on my PC and found that I could upload them to my LT photo gallery and then link them from there. Good luck!

I realize this thread is old, but when I saw this cover, I thought of it immediately. I mean, WTF?



It's for The Man who Mistook his Wife for a Hat by Oliver Sacks. Seriously, WTF? I mean, I know tits sell and men are just mesmerized by them, but really?

>50 Bookmarque: Love it. I foresee some seriously disappointed purchasers.

>50 Bookmarque: Threads don't get old in the pub, they just become part of the dragon's hoard.

I am not familiar with the book, but I feel your mental pain.

>50 Bookmarque: I would suggest it is the book-cover version of click bait.

>53 pgmcc: I am LOL'ing over here... the font I view LT with makes the word 'CLICK' in your post look like another word that only contains 4 letters and the result is... hilariously apropos to that book cover.

>54 ScoLgo:
LOL
Oh! You mean Chic!

:-)

>55 pgmcc: If only...

I am using the 'Verdana Standard' style combined with 'Desktop View', which ends up making your post appear like so:

I mean, I suppose there might be a tiny little sliver of daylight between the 'c' and 'l', if one really squints.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

>56 ScoLgo: It is somewhat appropriate, in an inappropriate way, if you know what I mean.

😂😂😂😂😂😂🐘

>54 ScoLgo: ha! I've noticed that before in other ways, and hadn't realized it was the font. Changing over to 'Georgia' now!

I'm loving this thread! It's nice that I can see it now ;)

My favourites are the Wuthering Heights and Dr Jekyll and Me Hyde covers.

>50 Bookmarque: Well, it's just that... ummm... sorry, what were you saying again?

>52 MrsLee: One of Oliver Sacks’ collections of essays on people with brain damage/neurodivergence. In the title essay, a man with, I believe, a brain tumour suffers from strange misperceptions, and at one point, as he leaves the house, reaches for his wife as if to put her on his head. She is fully clothed at the time.

>61 booksaplenty1949: Thank you. I have read and admired one of his essays in a publication of medical and science essays.

A puzzling cover, but quite appropriate for this book about a young spy in WWI, by Teri Brown. The title is encrypted using a rather simple code.

https://www.jarndyce.co.uk/catalogues/pdfs/270.pdf Covers here are apparently suitable to books’ contents, but if you are a fan of cover art in general and specifically of “yellowbacks” you will enjoy browsing this abundantly illustrated catalogue.

Ok what?? Did anyone involved with the cover actually read the book? Even the synopsis would have been enough to tell you that Amelia Peabody isn't a bleach blonde straight out of Miami Vice.

Here's one I came across that had me wondering how well the suit would work with her hair sticking out the back.



Even if you landed somewhere you could breathe and flipped up your visor...the hair thing makes no sense.

>66 Bookmarque: It does if you are hoping to hook up with an alien with a taste for blondes.

>66 Bookmarque: No, no, no, you have it all wrong!

The hair is part of the suit, not the woman. Obviously.

Ha! That explains it.

I'd say that it was a motorcycle helmet, except that the chin guard doesn't cover the mouth.

Perhaps her space suit has been ruptured at the back and is bleeding oxygen and hair. Might as well flip up the visor and meet your fate.

A bunch of weird ones came up for older books, but this was the weirdest -



Huh?

>71 Bookmarque: Publisher: "Design me a cover that says you haven't read the story without saying you haven't read the story."

Cover artist: "Got it Boss! I'm on it!"

>72 ScoLgo: LOL

>72 ScoLgo: Ah, that explains it!! I think... LOL

Dorian, how come your hair is immaculate, yet you never visit a barber?

>72 ScoLgo: That has to be the answer.

I suspect that someone used Chat GPT or something and that's what came out, but I have no idea what the prompt for this one would be -



The only person I recall eating in the book is Renfield, and he does not use a fork. At the start, Jonathan is served food at the Count's castle, but his host pointedly doesn't eat. Weird.

>77 Bookmarque: This was puzzling. Vampire fangs symbolism? But why a fork? I don't know, I just don't know... :D

>78 Alexandra_book_life:
Conjoined vampires?

>77 Bookmarque: Their so-called symbolism loses traction quickly. Forks imply eating of *solid* food stuffs whereas everyone in Dracula is busy drinking! They wear garlic; they don't season with it. I need to go back and look but I rather think that Jonathan is the only one who gets specific in diary or letters. He eats some form of goulash early on.

My first instinct was that this was some sort of reference to Hannibal Lector, but even if it is... why?

Seem to be two books published by the same company, both works long out of copyright. Many of the most random covers we see are apparently images slapped on to a “print on demand” book.

>77 Bookmarque: But it's such a nice haunting picture of a mysterious fork. Perhaps Dracula is very old, his fangs have fallen out, and he needs help poking the holes?
"Come my lovely, it's tine to drink your blood!" *spoken with a horrible accent*

Or. Dracula, the Tine-sylvanian.

>83 MrsLee: *groaning at* Tine-sylvanian

>83 MrsLee: I love your theory, lol, lol, lol.

>79 pgmcc: It's possible!

Is there a book about conjoined vampires out there? I'm not that fond of vampire books, but I would read that :)

>86 Alexandra_book_life:
Such a book would have double the bite.

>87 pgmcc: Indeed 😆

From the same batch of bad covers -

Ah, the iconic cocktail Gatsby drinks when he... uh.... does all those things. It was so narratively relevant and um, represented.... erm.... What was the name of that iconic cocktail again? The green light, maybe?

>89 Bookmarque: It's a beverage, in a glass, with a citrus. Soooo close, but missed the mark on all three.

>89 Bookmarque: Aesthetically I like that image a lot. The colour palette is lovely. As a cover for Gatsby? Not so much.

>83 MrsLee: Are you sure you're not thinking of Franken's Tine?

>93 TorMented: (audible groan)

>89 Bookmarque: Perhaps the artist intended to convey the idea of bath tub gin in the cocktail?

>93 TorMented: I like the way you think.

This one is a complete boggle:

https://www.kobo.com/gb/en/ebook/lorna-doone-a-romance-of-exmoor-54

deleted

>97 Maddz: Whoa! :D

>97 Maddz:
Lol

>99 Alexandra_book_life:, >100 pgmcc: I think they saw the word 'romance' in the title and didn't bother reading any further...

But then what do you expect from a publisher taking a public domain title and attempting to sell it.

Ok, so having read this book several times, there is no killer snowman, but it would be a fun solution to the crime a la the leg of lamb Twilight Zone episode.



Hercule Poirot's Christmas

>102 Bookmarque: That is indeed an intimidating and fierce-looking snowman. And agreed that it has absolutely nothing to do with the book by Agatha Christie. (For one thing, the snowman's buttons are not symmetrically aligned. And showing Poirot with a corncob pipe? I think not.)

>103 jillmwo: Snowman has killed Poirot for his hat? (Previously unknown Christie story).

>104 booksaplenty1949: That might be the case. I have not paid much attention to haberdashery in Agatha Christie's novels, but now I may need to see if this was an area of particular concern to Hercule Poirot. (We know he was particular about his suits.)

>105 jillmwo: Apparently Poirot is associated with the Homburg, while this is apparently a bowler, but perhaps we just do not have a clear view of the divot.

Do these look like a dog's eyes to anyone?

>107 Bookmarque: Oysters with a truffle topping. Mmmm!

>107 Bookmarque: Are these things eyes? :)))

>107 Bookmarque: Awful.

>107 Bookmarque: Two spoons with olives in them. Cujo is the best minimalist cookbook I've ever found. :) Also... why is the whole cover tilted? I'm not imagining that, right?